Columns

This week, another great issue of Mother Jones hit the newsstands (Hmmm…. Do we still have newsstands?) with a cover showing a tilted statue of Sen. Lindsey Graham in the process of being toppled. 

Oddly, while most magazines (Newsweek, Time, The Nation) are rolling out issues for the month of May, the newest Mother Jones is identified as the "March + April" edition. Still, it's worth waiting for—filled with timely features about national politics, an Indigenous struggle to protect sacred land from becoming a corporate uranium mine, an investigation of online political gamesmanship for profit, reflections on the legal repercussions of sexual harassment and a review of an academic debate over the claim that male and female brains process information differently. 

But one thing that struck me was the undercurrent of feisty "war-speak" that coursed through the pages. It began with the cover title: "Take Down: Inside the fight to topple Lindsey Graham." It continued on the inside with a removable pledge slip that invited readers to write a check and "Fight like Hell with us every month." It popped up in a page-five editorial that praised "hard-hitting journalism." And finally, on page 64, there was an ad for a bladder-control product that bore the headline: "Thanks to BetterWOMAN I'm winning the battle for Bladder Control." [Emphasis added throughout] 

Lorax Lyrics 

Dr. Seuss gave us a storybook creature called the Lorax, a feisty furry defender of Truffula Trees and free-range Brown Bar-ba-loots. 

The Lorax once spake a now-famous refrain that arose from his toes and embraced the terrain. And what was the phrase that arose from his lungs?: "I speak for the trees for the trees have no tongues." 

Pleased to report, the Lorax's legacy is alive and well in Berkeley. Several nights ago, during an evening walk down Marin Avenue, we found a sign taped to a tree. The crayon-scrawled message from a young neighborhood environmentalist read: "Hug Me! For I am a Tree! Happy Earth Day!" 

On another night, eight blocks away, we found another hand-drawn note attached to a branch dangling over the sidewalk. It read: "Did you thank a tree today? #LoveTrees @ThankTrees." 

And another tree near the Monterey Markey on Hopkins now hosts a sign that reads: "Didja know . . . Trees can Detect Light and Day Length, Gravity, and Pathogens!!! Wow!!!" 

Wow, indeed! The Lorax Lives! 

Interesting to note: While American children look forward to the annual holiday broadcasts of Dr. Seuss' "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas," our country's pro-consumption, commercial networks would never dare broadcast the anti-consumer/anti-capitalist message at the core of The Lorax (be it the 1972 original or the lavish 2012 star-studded 3D animated travesty revision). Here's a taste of the 1972 True-to-Seuss version. 

Bullock Is Bidding for Ballots 

I recently received a fund-raising letter from Steve Bullock, the Montana governor who's hoping to win a US Senate seat in November. Bullock is hoping to boot the GOP incumbent and help flip the Senate. In his four-page cover letter, Bullock claimed he had been contemplating retiring for politics to spend more time with his family. "With only 4 ½ years before the kids are out of the house, I had decided to step back." But decided to sacrifice full-time dad-hood in order to mount a campaign to pursue Democratic reforms in the US Senate. 

Although the Republicans hold a majority in Montana's state government, Bullock claims to have expanded Medicaid, put a freeze on college tuition, protected Net Neutrality, passed the country's "strongest anti-dark money laws," defended the Affordable Care Act, stood up for Americans with pre-existing conditions, stopped Big Carbon from despoiling public lands, and supported the rights of women and the working class. 

Sounds like a man with a plan. But when I took a closer look at the mail-back solicitation from Montanans for Bullock, I spotted a surprise in the small print: A line that instructed donors to make the enclosed check "payable to Bullock for President." 

This leaves me with a question: Was this the most embarrassing campaign typo in US electoral history or does Gov. Bullock really have grander plans for his future? And has he told his family? 

Watch Out, Trump. A Hot Plame May Be Coming Your Way 

Against her will, activist, author, and mom Valerie Plame became "America's most famous ex-spy" when a member of the George W. Bush administration "outted" her as a secret CIA agent. Plame's life was turned inside-out in revenge for her husband's opposition to the Bush Administration's plot to invade Iraq. Plame's husband, Ambassador Joe Wilson, challenged Bush's tall tale that Saddam Hussein was secretly buying yellowcake uranium from Niger. As payback for her husband's independence, Dick Cheney's henchman, Scooter Libby, leaked Plame's secret identity to the press. 

Plame and Wilson retired to New Mexico to raise their two children—far from the intrigues of the Beltway. (They divorced in 2017.) 

Today, Plame, while chronologically 56 years old, has the youthful appearance and boundless energy of a twenty-something. And she's getting back into politics—but this time in public—as a progressive candidate for the US House of Representatives. 

Plame is one of four candidates jousting for a Congressional seat in the imminent June 2 primary. Plame, however, is the only candidate who is being attacked in scurrilous ads financed by a steady flow of "dark money." Plame is undeterred. She is promoting her campaign with some of the most awesome TV spots in the history of politics. They are worthy of her background—with car stunts and physical stints that look like out-takes from a James Bond blockbuster. Here's a sample: 

"I have lived all over the world," Plame tells her fellow New Mexicans, "and I have never felt more connected to a place and its special people than in The Land of Enchantment. Our state is magical in many ways, and I want to continue to protect its unique cultures and communities." 

Some of the challenges she's promised to tackle include: lowering healthcare costs, protecting the air and water, improving public education, ensuring equal rights, promote the right to vote, and (ironic for a double-agent) "combating gun violence." 

Bibi's Bid to Say Bye-Bye to Bitter Bummer 

You gotta give Israeli co-leader and indicted criminal suspect Benjiam Netanyahu credit for a breakaway example of chutzpah. Bibi is the first sitting president to face sitting on a prison cot. But first he needs to appear in an Israeli courtroom. 

With this accounting imminent, Netanuayu and his enablers have come up with a stunning argument designed to excuse the Likud leader from making a court appearance. 

Israel, like most of the world, is dealing with the threat of the Covid-19 pandemic. Hence, Bibi's brilliant alibi. According to the Associated Press, Bibi's attorneys have argued that the tainted leader (who is always surrounded by a phalanx of beefy security guards) must be excused from appearing in court in the interests of public health since "his bodyguards’ presence would violate Health Ministry social distancing requirements." 

Bibi's not the only celebrity to use the coronavirus as a get-out-of-jail-free card. A growing list of Trump conspirators have been leaping out of jail citing their need to be distanced from the crowded confines of our country's unsanitary prisons. The recently released include disgraced general and former National Security Advisor Michael Flynn, Trump campaign honcho Paul Manafort, and Trump's personal attorney Michael Cohen. Waiting in the wings: Trump confidant and convicted liar Roger Stone. 

Comic Strip Cliches 

British comic Spike Milligan is said to have observed: "The cliché is the handrail of a crippled mind." Cartoonist John Caldwell snaps back with the defense that "Cliches are the building blocks that we throw at the writing blocks. Often, they're the best way to break through." Here are just some of the recurring, seemingly eternal set-ups for drawn jokes. Which ones have I missed? 

Two men stranded on a dinner-table-sized deserted island. Aliens in a UFO. Aliens in a UFO beaming up a victim. A thirsty loner crawling across a dry desert with vultures overhead. Guy on street with a sign reading 'The End is Near." Dinosaurs Facing Extinction. Meeting St. Peter at the Gate. In Heaven with Angles, Clouds, and Halos. In and Out Trays on a Work Desk. The Grim Reaper. A Job Interview. Adam and Eve. Satan in Hell. Rapunzel's Hair. Cavemen. Psychoanalyst and Couch. "Waiter, there's a fly in my soup." 

And then there are some once-but-no-longer favorites retired for the better-good: Travelers on a Flying Carpet. "Savages" dancing around a hot-tub-sized pot cooking a batch of missionaries. Other queasy clichés now retired and buried include: A caveman dragging cavewoman by the hair; a boss chasing a secretary around an office desk. 

One last cliché. This eternal strip shows a "seeker" climbing a mountain to ask a bearded recluse: 'What's the secret of life?" 

Stephan Pastis, a former lawyer-turned-toonist, delights in skewering clichés in his own Pearls Before Swine strip. On May 19, Pastis posted a strip in the Chronicle that showed a sign at the bottom of a mountain with an arrow pointing upwards and the words "Wise-ass on the Hill." 

The strip's characters, Rat and Pig, make their way to the summit only to discover the Wise Ass is a donkey sitting in a Sukhasana yoga position. 

Freedom of the Press Is Dying in America 

The 2020 World Press Freedom Index is now available and it reflects poorly on the US. When it comes to the Fifth Estate, the Land of the Free has a dismal record. The US now finds itself Number 45 in a field of 180. 

Not surprisingly, most of the top ten countries on this list (as on so many other lists) are Scandanavian—Norway, Finland, Denmark, Sweden, Netherlands—followed by Jamaica, Costa Rica, Switzerland, New Zealand and Portugal. 

Other countries that aced-out the US for advancing and protecting press freedoms include: Estonia, Uruguay, Suriname, Samoa, Latvia, Namibia, Liechtenstein, Lithuania, Ghana, Slovakia, Burkina Faso, Botswana, and Taiwan. 

The main reason for this slump in our First Amendment freedoms? Donald Trump. 

Here's the verdict: From the Index's authors at Reporters Without Borders: 

"Press freedom in the United States continued to suffer during President Donald Trump’s third year in office. Arrests, physical assaults, public denigration and the harassment of journalists continued in 2019, though the numbers of journalists arrested and assaulted were slightly lower than the year prior.  

"Much of that ire has come from President Trump and his associates in the federal government, who have demonstrated the United States is no longer a champion of press freedom at home or abroad. This dangerous anti-press sentiment has trickled down to local governments, institutions and the American public.  

"In March 2019, a leaked document revealed the US government was using a secret database tracking journalists, activists and others who border authorities believed should be stopped for questioning when crossing certain checkpoints along the US-Mexico border.  

"A couple months later, the Justice Department charged Wikileaks co-founder Julian Assange with 17 counts of the WWI-era Espionage Act. If he is convicted, this would set a dangerous precedent for journalists who publish classified US government information of public interest moving forward.  

"Under President Trump, the White House has strategically replaced traditional forms of press access with those that limit the ability of journalists to ask questions of the administration. The last daily, televised White House press briefing led by a press secretary took place in March 2019, and since then, the federal government has made multiple attempts to deny specific journalists and news outlets access to other opportunities for press engagement." 

 

Vikram Aggarwal, the Founder & CEO of EnergySage.com, has some good news: "For the first time in our country's history, we're expected to generate more electricity from renewables than from coal this year." This milestone has been achieved years before prior industry estimates. 

An EnergySage survey found that 63 percent of homeowners considering the move to solar claim they are more motivated to make the transition as a response to the COVID-19 pandemic. The pandemic has "actually accelerated their timeline for going solar."